My Top-Ten List Of Easy Video Game Bosses, First Edition
Alright, I might as well make a top-ten. It was going to happen eventually. These are the easiest bosses in video games I have personally seen.
First off, the rues.
1. With only one or two exceptions (and you'll see why), they can only be from games I have played.
2. Only one boss character from each franchise.
3. RPG bosses are kept to a minimum.
Now the list:
10.
If you're wondering why RPG bosses are being kept to a minimum, it's because of Lance from Pokemon Gold, Silver, Crystal, HeartGold and SoulSilver. Of all the champions in Pokemon games, he is the lowest leveled, meaning that if you sneak a team of Lv 100s on to your game he's a pushover. Also, Kingdra and Froslass wreck this guy, so it's not even necessary.
9. (Flame Shield Engaged)
"Welcome... TO MY LAIR!" Alright... a lot of you are going to wonder why Wheatly from Portal 2 is on this list. The answer: He has an extremely slow and predictable attack pattern, you have plenty of time to defeat him, and the method you use to defeat him is completely obvious. GLaDOS was easy. Wheatly was easier. Deadly lair my foot.
8.
You get a guy in black armor with a red laser sword. I get a giant floating monkey head with mechanical hands. Andross (hard route) from Star Fox 64 is anything but hard. If you have the hyper laser equipped you can burn through his first stage in under a minute, and his true form's only difficulty is his annoying tendency to teleport behind you. You almost can't die from this guy. The assault carrier is harder!
7.
You know what annoys me? Artificially lengthened boss fights without any actual content or challenge. The worst offender? Daemon Prince Kyrus from Warhammer 40,000 Dawn of War 2: Retribution. He can do some damage, but by the time you reach him, you just can't lose. He starts by summoning three towers that make him invincible, but they go down in less than a minute, and you can just spam Predators/Chaos Predators/Leman Russes/Falcons/Looted Wagons/Tyrant Guard constantly. Once the towers are down, he goes down at a steady rate. You'd expect more from the former chapter master of the Blood Ravens...
6.
The 2D Sonic games weren't extremely hard, but they made you earn your victory sequence and staff credits. However, the games weren't exactly known for difficult bosses. Enter Dr. Robotnik's stupid little Drill Tank from Sonic the Hedgehog 2, a boss that practically insults the average person's intelligence. First off, it's not creative, but that's something else entirely. This thing is pretty easy - just jump on top of it. You can usually beat it in the first pass without getting hit.
5.
This is the second exception to the RPG rule, and for good reason. You try and kill him normally, and he destroys you. So why is this next guy on the list? BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT DOING IT RIGHT! Gogo the Magical Mimic from Final Fantasy 5 is one of the easiest bosses I have seen. You just stand there, staring at him, and he dies in five minutes. Yawn...
4.
What happens when you take a basic enemy and make it a boss? Usually you get a creative twist to that enemy, or at the very least you get a giant, super-powerful version of it. Not so with the Arena Waddle Dee in Kirby Superstar and Kirby Superstar Ultra. Just a basic Waddle Dee, nothing else. Of course, don't stare into his beady eyes...
3.
There's not too many actual bosses in racing games. There's also not too many things in F-Zero that are easy. This is why I was surprised when I found Megan, the staff ghost of the Championship mode of F-Zero Maximum Velocity, to be unusually easy. I beat her on my first try with arguably the worst machine in the game, the Wind Walker. Next...
2.
Have you ever heard of a boss that is afraid of heights? No? Then you haven't played Chrono Trigger. The Golem Overlord will power up a huge attack, but then he won't do anything... he's afraid of heights. After a short while, he'll just jump off. I know he's from an RPG, but he technically doesn't break the rule - a boss like this in any game would be easy.
1. (Flame Shield Engaged)
This last one breaks every single rule, plus he's the most overrated character in video game history, PLUS he's the worst Villain (I won't say worst boss character, but he'd make a better Giant Space Flea from Nowhere than a plot-important character).
You probably know who I'm talking about. He kills people because his mother tells him to. The only thing he has going for him is that he looks bad-###. That's ALL he does.
Yes... I'm talking about Sephiroth from Final Fantasy 7. Not mutant angel Sephiroth, just the normal one in the planet's core or some pocket dimension or whatever. We all know that Omni-Slash will kill him in one hit, but did you know that even an automatic counterattack can? Yes. You can beat Sephiroth... wait for it... BY DOING NOTHING! If you attack, he dies quicker than Dr. Robotnik's Drill Tank and the Arena Waddle Dee, and if you don't attack he dies quicker than Gogo and the Golem Overlord. He can't kill you! If Square Enix should of just made it a cut-scene, as there is NO POINT to this battle besides closing the story.
Yeash... need I say more?
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